Sex on the Beach.

Yo. This always sounds like such a great, romantic, spontaneous idea. Am I right?

I live at the beach. Sounds so hot.

But ladies…if you've tried this you know that the minute that one speck of sand gets into the mix it becomes decidedly less sexy and more, well, painful.

Well, after chemo, my vagina flew past sex on the beach to a dry day in the Sahara Desert. WTF? And not just dry but tight and painful. And all of a sudden my brain couldn’t connect to my pelvic floor muscles. When did I turn from a - dare I say it? - hot 40 year old to an old lady? I surely was not amused and neither was my partner. Honey, if you ever read this blog, you know that I only speak the truth. 

Anywhosit…this will be an ongoing conversation but I would like to tell you about two of the non-hormonal self treatments I have been using to help me reclaim my vagina. 

Number one is the Golden Hour Kit from the aforementioned Tabu Group. Natalie from Tabu and I were introduced  by mutual friends about a month after my first brain surgery in 2020. In the course of coming on board as a medical advisor for her company, she sent me their first offering, the Golden Hour Kit. Of course I checked it out. Duh. But after chemo and all of the issues I suddenly had, I really started using the kit regularly. Both the lubricant for the dryness (I like to think of it like a “facial serum” for my lady bits +  the wand for performing self stretching of my muscles and fascia inside of my vagina. Using this a couple of times a week is how I got back to having sex. I get a little verklempt writing this because sex after cancer and the associated hormonal bankruptcy has been  - and continues to be - such a journey. And why does nobody talk about or prepare you for this? Ugh. Or the effects on identity, self worth, mental health and partner relations? Rough. Thank goodness Tabu sort of found me and I was introduced to such a great Kit that helped me bounce back .

Number Two is my Perifit Care+. So this is the new generation of this product and I literally shipped one to my brother’s house in Portugal in anticipation of a visit there, before they shipped this updated version to the US. Thankfully, they now ship to the US too. This little home-biofeedback device helped me re-learn the brain-body connection in order to find my own pelvic floor muscles and retrain them to be more resilient against the urinary leaks,  i.e. stress and urge (mixed) urinary incontinence.

Vagina games for the training win! 

My personal favorite game: Vortex. I wanted to love the Under the Sea game, but I wanted that dolphin to swim! My lifting coach can attest to the fact that I may still leak a little if I am too overloaded (read: heavy squat and holding my breath). Sorry for nearly peeing on your shoe as you spotted me! But I am back to mild  athletic incontinence versus something I am concerned about. And my clinical patients can attest to how often I recommend this to them for their home exercise programs as well. 

Use code Heidi20 for 20% off Tabu products!

Use code Heidi25 for 25% off Perifit products!